Writing Sample Term 3

A few weeks ago our class had to do a writing sample test. Here is my piece.

SUNRISE 17/6/2020

Floating on the top of the water. Sitting on your board, staring out at the faded blue line. After each swell passes, beneath the sand below folds over, creating ripples on the seafloor. Awaiting a perfect wave to appear. A salty breeze rustles through your hair and all the water droplets sitting on your face trickle down.The cracking noise against your board is drowned out by seagulls soaring above. 

Gazing at the wax marks on your board you notice a small orange dot appear in the corner of your eye. You raise your head to see the sun slowly beginning to peek up from behind the horizon. Colours splatter across the sky. Clouds turn from a blank canvas to a whole painting. Faded pink, orange, and yellow colours reflect onto the ocean. The water sits dead as a warm shine falls down onto you, heating your whole body. 

You try to look in the distance for a ride but the water is nothing but sparkles as the sun climbs over the horizon. It's blinding, so blinding that you are swept off your board by a wave. Tumbling around through the wave you make your way back up to the surface. 

Standing in the white foamy water, your toes sink into the sand, knowing that the day has officially begun.

Charlie Keepa

 im pretty cool aye (btw this is pretty trash don't judge :))

Once I submitted this piece I got to do back and recraft it for 15 minutes. My teacher Miss Willock came back with my results. Here they are.